I’m a med student on my IM rotation. Today we got called for an admission and when we went to the ED the patient was coding, ED docs already running the code and everything. My residents started to help and I just stand in the corner, trying not to get in the way but staying ready to do compressions if they need me to. The patients whole family is in the room. A lot of stuff happens and I’m still just standing there. One of my residents turns and asks if I’m ok. Just being asked that, I want to cry. I hold it together and quietly leave the room. I am not even sure if the patient survived…they were very old and sick so probably not. I got to this work room for students and I just start sobbing. Eventually my residents find me there and ask if I’m okay. I say I’m fine, I just never saw a code before. One of the residents says “it’s okay everyone has to go sometime.” Obviously I do understand that everyone dies, and objectively especially for an old sick patient that might be better than suffering. But I had never seen that before. It’s normal to have an emotional response right? I am just sort of self conscious about going back to working with those residents tomorrow.
Source: Original link