I’m now through the 6 first months of EM residency. I feel like I’ve become a good doctor, and that I can finally contribute and make my own decisions. At the same time I’m increasingly weighed down by a small handfull of incidents where I either made the wrong decisions, was forgetful due to being busy, or could have simply just done better. It has started to increasingly affect the way I work (I slow down the department due to double or tripple-checking everything, calling in maybe not so necessary consults, or ordering extra unnecessary tests- juust to make sure) – I feel like I’m becoming way to defensive in my approach to medicine in order to avoid mistakes, which sometimes just slows down or completely paralyzes progress of certain patients. It has also started to affect me personally – when I’m off work and should just enjoy being with my family, I spend an increasing amount of time worrying about whether this patient is going to be OK, or whether that incident will end up in a complaint, or eventually end up affecting my residency or ultimately my license. I need a healthy and good way to deal with this, otherwise I feel like I’m not going to last long in this career, even though I love it and feel like I’m good at it! Any help is appreciated!
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